Terrifier 3 (2024)

 

If you don’t know, don’t watch. On a scale of one to ten, this rates a shit ton of gore on the not-for-you scale, this is a gross out contest between Damien Leone and the world. And the world is calling uncle. This film starts out slow if not a little discombobulated. Showing what Art the Demoniac Clown has been up to for the last five years. But once the movie starts choppin it goes fast. Damien has said maybe we get a part four but that might be it. He has to have some offers to direct some bigger movie where the studios will actually give him a budget. Even if part four is the ‘last one’ I would bet anything that ten, fifteen, twenty years from now Damien will circle back to this character, or give someone else permission to run with it. If it’s someone else though it might be more like forty years…. Creative people don’t trust other people with their characters unless they know they’re done with them. Kind of like Don Coscarelli did with Tall Man. ‘Phantasm: Ravager’ (2016) saw this awesome franchise go out with a whimper. David Hartman didn’t seem to have a vision for it. The only good parts of this movie are the end credits. Originally meant as a web series, remember those (neither do I)? They were a thing at the dawn of the interweb.

Sienna is once again played by Lauren LaVera. Horror movies shoots some actresses to stardom, while others are ignored. Given the amount to screen time, actual acting she does, then goes toe to nose with Art for a drag down all the way to hell fight, she deserves credit! After Terrifier 2 took off, making ten million on a $250,000 budget, she was the natural one of the cast to really benefit. Like Bianca Bradley from the Wormwood Series (please make another one!), Suzanne Snyder from ‘Night of the Living Dead 2’ (1988), Karoline Brandt in ‘Skinned Deep’ (2004) maybe it wasn’t meant to be. Hoping she comes back for part four.

Art the Clown, the giddy Freddy Kruger if he was a mime clown, is played to perfection by David Howard Thornton. Triva, he played The Joker in a couple episodes of ‘Nightwing: Escalation’ (2016) and Terrifier 3 just had a bigger weekend box office than Joker 2. Art is a nice change of pace from other horror icons. He is over the top playful, then he busts out the knives. The shock to the watcher’s system is real. Spoiler alert, Art is one clown that likes to play with his food.

Terrifier 3 YouTube trailer

Mr. Leone for T4 please bring back Art’s mini-me, Catherine Corcoran (don’t care she’s dead, figure it out), keep the cameo’s coming (loved the old school horror actors popping up), I think the Easter Bunny should get the same treatment you gave Santa this go around (if you need ideas see Lobo, Paramilitary Christmas Special 1991) the pastel colors dripping with blood would be a sight.

 

Joker: Folie a Deux (Part 2) (2024) Movie Review

 

Brilliant Movie! Haters just don’t understand. There were so many clues. Going to touch on some spoilers, (kind of) will give warning not to read past a certain point till after you watch the movie. It’s not what you would expect. But it's what the character deserves and they have been dropping clues. So, fanboys should have known.

So, what happens to people who go through a public fiasco. Sometimes through just a momentary mental break. Or just the right place at the right time, or more often the wrong place at the wrong time. More so now than ever, people get filmed and put on blast when clearly, they are going through something traumatic. What happens after someone gets caught on video something unintentionally bad, funny, iconic, or ironic. Everyone expects more of the same. Another sound bite, or another amazing feat, or another murder. Truth is usually gets tiring quick. The book ‘On the Road’ by Jack Kerouac immortalized Neal Cassady in the personification of Dean Moriarty. Based on a couple of road trips over just a few years at the end it’s clear Kerouac is tired of Cassady and kind of paints him as a loser. Of course, the book opened up doors and everyone wanted to get to know this fast talker that had ideas, questions, and endless thirst for adventure. Reading about his later adventures his relationships are short lived too. But those doors opened up to famous authors. Which is cool, but who was he; A lewd drunk yelling at cops  just being a dick, serial womanizer, a rambling druggie? Everyone hoped to meet the non-conformist James Dean rebel portrayed in the beginning of ‘On the Road’. 

The Symbionese Liberation Army who famously kidnapped Patty Hearst. Several of the members on the run from police knocked on a random door in Berkley California. The people living there agreed to take them in expecting mind opening conversation. But were shocked on how normal they were. These idyllical rebels that were all over television had nothing really to say. It’s always said ‘never meet your heroes’ they will never live up to expectations. Joker 2 (while not a hero) we get to know him a little too well.

Joker 2 Trailer YouTube

According to Wikipedia, Folie à deux is “Shared Psychosis”. It begs to wonder how much of the movie is only Arthur Fleck’s aka ‘The Joker’ (Joaquin Phoenix) or Lee Quinzel’s, not the Harley, (Lady Gaga)(who I feel was just playing a slightly different version of herself) heads? Author is very frail and withdrawn waiting for trail. Mercilessly berated by the guards, one brilliantly played by Brendan Gleeson. Who just have the same taunts every day (type of guy who laughs at his own jokes). He seems haunted by his life, the things he’s endured. Lady Gaga plays a follow inmate at Arkham who catches the Jokers eye. Singing ensues, a lot of singing, with a French vibe, looking at you Lady Gaga….. The singing goes on, after the point is made, to the level of obnoxious. With a run time of two hours and eighteen minutes trimming the songs a little bit would have made the movie flow better. Over all, the depiction is Arthur is a nobody (with clear mental struggles) who someone handed a gun to and immediately kills some people. Could have easily shot himself in the eyeball looking down the barrel to see if it was loaded. People hoping to see a movie with an epic show down with Batman, you haven’t been paying attention. This movie is about the aftermath of Arthurs thirty seconds of fame.

SPOILERS, DO NOT READ UNTIL YOU WATCH THE MOVIE!

 SPOILERS, DO NOT READ UNTIL YOU WATCH THE MOVIE!

SPOILERS, DO NOT READ UNTIL YOU WATCH THE MOVIE!

SPOILERS, DO NOT READ UNTIL YOU WATCH THE MOVIE!

SPOILERS, DO NOT READ UNTIL YOU WATCH THE MOVIE!

SPOILERS, DO NOT READ UNTIL YOU WATCH THE MOVIE!

Clues your not watching the movie you think;

This Joker’s name is Arthur Fleck.

The Joker’s name we know from the comic book is Jack Oswald White or Jack Napier in the movies.

In one of the Animations Joker says there was someone else using the name before him.

Joker is described as a disfigured, criminal mastermind. Hardly fits Arthur.

In the first movie we see Thomas Wayne and a young Bruce Wayne. Arthur is already in his forties. It would be hard for a sixty-year-old to be fighting Batman.

In this movie he admits to killing six people. It is strongly implied he killed the physiatrist (walking down the hall at the end with blood-soaked shoes) which would have been seven. Some things shown in the movie he just imagined.

It seems like most of his relationship with Lee Quinzel is in his head, like an imaginary friend. So, the folie à deux is a shared psychosis with his imaginary friend. Some of the scenes don’t make sense that she’s there. Most likely the limited relationship they had was greatly expanded in Arthur’s head due to loneliness and mental health. Lee is just a lonely rich girl who wants revenge or attention from her daddy by publicly having a relationship with a famous criminal.

This Joker was some poor schmuks’ thirty seconds of fame and was only a footnote in Gotham’s seedy history. In the time period Batman is lurking in the shadows no one remembers this Joker.

Almost everyone thought they were watching a different movie.

Mic Drop- Todd Phillips played us all! Well Done!

 

The Substance 2024 film

Was not expecting a gory horror movie. Demi Moore, Dennis Quaid, and Margaret Qualley one would expect more of a drama or an attempt at a lame horror movie that’s going to be kind of boring. They don’t waste a lot of time in the beginning with character development, just get down into the madness. This is a well-earned R rating. For main stream actors it’s surprising how hard this R is.

A role that has to hit close to home for Demi Moore and most actresses in Hollywood. Her character an aging celebrity, in a sleezy town fixated on beauty, trying to hang-on and remain relevant. To be fair Demi has been acting non-stop since the 80’s. But she delivers a brutal performance that is shocking. I don’t think there is another actress that could play this role, or would want to. For a person who all their life has built and maintained this glamourous image the viewer gets utterly blindsided by her role. Demi does all the heavy lifting and makes this movie. Can’t think of any other actress except Charlize Theron in Monster (2003) that has so drastically laid it all out there in the most unflattering way.

Dennis Quaid has always been one of those guys people like to watch on the screen. He usually doesn’t go to far from the nice guy persona. He goes full Hollywood Sleaze here. It fun watching him embrace the role. Dennis has probably less than two minutes of screen time but he makes it memorable. Margaret Qualley plays the younger, hotter, up and coming Sue. The only role I’d previously seen her in is Maid (2021) which she played a dumpy looking young mother. The make-up and costume people in the Maid deserve an award. Roles like Margaret plays in this movie have been few since the me too movement. Her role of Sue is brutally objectified in the beginning of the film. I thought I was watching a French movie or something.

There is a scene where Sue has on star shaped earrings. The second I saw this it reminded me of Revenge (2017), a movie I haven’t seen in seven years. Looking up the movie, it’s the same director Coralie Fargeat. Also, in a seen it shows a grotesque knee giving flashbacks to the Fly (1986) which is one of the movies Coralie said influenced her. If you haven’t seen Revenge, it’s a great movie, go check it out. Hopefully some studios or Netflix gives her a bunch of money to make more films and we don’t have to wait another seven years to hear from Ms. Fareat again.

YouTube Trailer Substance Movie

One of the critiques I had of Revenge was it was too long at one hour forty-eight minutes. Just really the last scene dragged out. I miss editors and constraints of old media, in a new digital media world (which space is free) the length of a reel is no longer a constraint, bound by seconds and cost (nor the size of the watcher’s bladder) not fitting an article to a small corner on the page everything is just too long for my popcorn brain. It’s a feeling content creators stretch everything out as much as possible (I get it, that’s how you get paid) but as a consumer its less enjoyable. Steven king was forced to edit the Stand book down by 600 pages. I’ve read the original version; it is long and boring. Newspaper articles were short and sweet, written so the average fifth grader could understand it. Now I get to page five of an article I don’t remember who Joe is or why I’m reading an article about him. Substance is two hours and twenty-one minutes. The whole final act goes past what felt like the dramatic end to set up a couple gag shots. The French maybe don’t have end credit scenes? Snippets of this final act would play well during the end credits.  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

'The Black Cauldron' retro movie review (1985)

 

Before Games of Thrones and after Lord of the Rings where was The Chronicles of Prydain. Every Nerd in the seventies read this series before Lord of the Rings. Following the rise of Taran, the lowly pig keeper, In to the Chaos of the princesses, wizards, swords and the horned King. Disney purchased the rights fairly quickly. Then used that carrot to hire the next generation animation talent. Which they did, should have set up Disney for domination for the next generation.

 Unfortunately, with Walt Disney’s passing The Nine Old Men were left running the show. Walt was the visionary, extremely talented, and driving force that was Disney. The Nine Old Men were his minions, carrying out the creative out pouring. Talented in their own right but they weren’t the Disney magic. They also were used to having a wonderful advantage of being the only game in town in several ways. Not much competition for animation movies, children’s entertainment or color. Where else could one see vibrant colors? By the time work started on The Black Caldron they were well aged. The Nine Old men notably all worked on ‘Snow White and The Seven Dwarfs’ 1937. Fast forward 50 years they were past their creative prime. It might be unfair and even blasphemy to say such things. But they didn’t grow up with Black Caldron and by all accounts the attempts at bringing the characters to animation life were subpar to the next generation that was brought in to work on this movie. In reality no one was running the show over the course of almost twenty years on this project, all sorts of people were signing off on stories, character development, ideas, technology, what format to use that made little sense. And no one seemed to remember why or who made these decisions.

Don Bluth left due to creative signation, taking a number of animators with him, had a string of hits like The Secret of NIMH, An American Tail, The Land Before time before having financial problems do to several distributors and financial backers pulling out at the worst moment. John Lasseter was let go from Disney for pushing computer Animation. He ended up over at Pixar, directing Toy Story. Tim Burton who creating some amazing artwork that was turned down also left, ending up a house hold name just a few years later.

The Black Cauldron Trailer

This movie sort of became the changing of the guard at Disney. In came Michael Eisner and Roy E Disney changing the random decisions being made by anyone that walked by, lifted the ban on sequels, having screen plays written instead of a couple vague story boards (worked with simple fairy tales) less so with a movie spanning over 5 books with a cast of 30 characters, focusing on more grown-up entertainment.

Troubled History short video

The Black Cauldron is an enjoyable movie. Stripped down to a few characters, having a boy, girl, black caldron and the Horned King. The animation is very Disney, the story moves quickly due to trying to fit so many elements of the first two books. While it fails to capture the saga, it does unfold a good little movie. If marketed better and released in the mid seventies instead of a decade late it could have been a decent hit. Being stuck in development and trying to use outdated format with several methods that didn’t add much or work out that added to a ballooned budget of 44 million. The Great Mouse Detective that was release one year later had a budget of 14 million was considered a hit with a million less dollar opening weekend.

 

'Naked Zombie Girl is Back' Movie Review 2022

 

First there was George Romero, then Lloyd Kaufman followed by Fred Olen Ray, backing Sam Raimi. Now there is Rickey Bird. It doesn’t matter how woke or how beta society becomes there will always be lonely, deviant teenage boys who want to see blood, broads, and boobs. NZG delivers that.

Starring the very naked and beautiful Nicole Cinaglia in the title role. She came here to get naked and kill zombies with a chainsaw. And she’s a strong powerful modern female so she can do both. Lucky us! D.T. Carney is chasing the money she’s carrying. Luck for us he’s a dude so he can’t multi-task, so he is fully clothed for a freezing winter night. And his aim isn’t much better than a storm trooper. Normally a chainsaw verses gun battle is kinda one sided. A beretta holds nine, and a chainsaw…….. I wonder how many zombies she gets per gallon?

Special Effects are handled by Nick Reisinger. There are several close-up shots of the zombies and things being squished, popped with stuff coming out that are phenomenal. This isn’t badly lit, quick fly by, shapeless blobs that aren’t scary. But, full on, ‘that was awesome’, let’s see it again!

NZGiB Trailer YouTube

NZGiB is a fun little movie to watch in a dark place, away from your mother.  First rule of NZG is don’t talk about it or they will make you talk to a professional mental health specialist. God, definitely don’t post about it or you will wind up in Facebook jail. Quietly wait in your lair for this precious series to spawn another bloody disgusting, spartially clothed, two stroke fumed episode.

The Black Phone (2022) Movie Review

 

Low key, suttle, unassuming could be used to describe this film. From these words one might think it’s not worth watching. But these are the qualities that make it so good. And are maddening to any horror fan or director. So simple and under the radar. Most probably only checked it out for the fantastic poster and or Ethan Hawk. Why aren’t more horror movies like this not made?

 

Nothing wrong with the horrifically gawdy over the top wide release films. But for true horror fans we tend to enjoy things, with feeling, that feeling of the hair raising up on the back of your necks, jumping out of the seat, having to look away from the impending doom, yelling at the characters who want to check out noise in the basement. People say they love horror and they list Stephen King and Evil Dead. But I want to talk to people who love Peter Struab, Jack Ketchum, Robert Bloch, Dan Simmons, watch the films ‘The Host’ (2006), ‘Touch of Evil’ (1958), ‘Night Moves’ (1975), ‘It Follows’ (2014). Anyone could have made this movie on a shoe string budget. Some kids using an iPhone or camcorder. Or some college students in Michigan who hit up everyone they know for money to make a low budget horror film. Let all of us fans agree Evil Dead and Stephen King are the shit and talk about the others.

 

It added an extra layer of creepy that this neighborhood is right up the street from where I currently live. The film is a horror story before the supernatural comes a knocking. The hero has no idea why he is doing all these random things to escape and absolutely maddening he doesn’t stick to one strategy. And the Grabber is playing his own little games that only make sense to him. The Grabber is here to punish naughty boys and chew bubble gum, he’s all out of gum.

 

YouTube Black Phone Trailer

Ethan Hawke is just one of those actors that keeps showing in good movies. He has been a few big movies, but repeatedly finds good movies to be in. Mr. Hawke could be thought of a horror actor as of late but looking at his IMDB page he has been in all types of movies, indies and takes supporting rolls. Seeing interviews with actors on how all the good rolls dried up or they got type casted. But Ethan has avoided this fate, been all over the place for the better part of 40 years staring in big studio pictures and low budget indies. It looks like his Daughter Maya Hawke is going to take after her dad. She already has 25 acting credits in four years.

 

A great story, that is going to spawn a prequal and a ton of copy cats. It leaves a simple blue print on how to make a great movie. No need for quick and witty dialog, big special effects budget, traveling around the world for the perfect shot, tons of shooting locations, or make up. At the end of the day anyone in the world could have shot this in their basement. Maybe the production quality and acting wouldn’t be as good. At the same time it’s not that easy to come up with a great idea, write it into a screen play, and transfer that on to film. Writers Joe Hill (son of Stephen King), Scott Derrickson, and Robert Carhill, and a mask designed by Tom Savini, just make it look so easy here.

Bloody Hell Movie Review 2021

It was once said every movie made has the same plot; Boy comes to town, meets girl, saves girl, rides off into the sunset with said girl. Plot might be the same as every movie ever but director Alistor Grierson and Writer Robert Benjamin make this movie their own and very entertaining with that plot. There is a scene in ‘Full Metal Jack’ (1987) with the privates chanting “This is my Rifle. There are many others like it, but this one is mine”. Well, this movie is definitely Alister and Robert’s.

Rex n Rex a vet with mental health issues is just trying to stay out of trouble. But there’s Bad Rex and Worse Rex so an average boring day just trying to get a few errands done turns into the path less taken, for good reason. When trouble has other plans, it’s hard to hide for long. The little sister of fate is all to happily snipping away at the strings in front of her, while her sisters know all too well there are plenty more for her to cut.

The movie starts at a brisk pace, and never slows down. Even in the basement when it’s just Rex, without a leg to stand on not knowing what’s going on, the pace doesn’t feel slow. The viewer is in the same boat with the character unsure why he’s there and what creepy white people things are about to happen.

Bloody Hell Trailer 2021

Ben O’Toole plays the deeply troubled charming bad boy Bruce Campbellish type to a devilish T. Not taking his messed-up life the least bit serious. Meg Fraser plays the sweet and normal Marilyn Muster type dead on, but she isn’t that innocent. By the end of the movie they seem like a good couple, but going to be more than a handful to keep each other’s table manners in check and to Finnish each other jokes.

A horror film with comedic styling of the ‘Evil Dead’ (1981). If someone tries to make a horror movie without being inspired by Ash and his boom stick, I don’t want to see it. This is just a fun movie that deserves a midnight showing. And maybe even a second go around.